The venue was Tory Row in Cambridge, MA. Around two dozen people showed up. There was a bit of history on how the project started, how it started with a story, of course. And one story led to another, and now, through this simple act of story-telling, the Good Man Project is sparking a national discussion on what it means to be a man in America today. Essay winner Perry Glasser read “Iowa Black Dirt.” Tom Matlack read “Crash and Learn.” There were questions, discussion, laughter. And when we asked the audience, “Does this whole question of manhood matter to you?” there were eloquent answers. One felt the stories help teach lessons, another man cited that there is a building market for these kinds of stories especially since he just listened to a story of NPR about Michael Lewis’ book. Someone else admitted he uses the website as a touchstone to help him think through his current challenges as a working family man.
The book tour has begun.
Larry, James and Tom at Tory Row
To me this is really comes down to the importance of each person (man for our sake since it is so hard to break the cultural expectation that we are cave dwellers) figure out their own story. Those that are redeemed and those, even some in our book, who really aren’t. The point is the question: what is your story as a human being? By even answering that the concept of what it means to be “good,” which in my view is purely self-determined, begins to have meaning. For Kamber it means recording war in all its violence despite the fact that guy can’t live anything like a normal life. He is just too damaged. For Stuart is singing on the street. For John Oliver its actually feeling, once and for all, the enormity of having come back from Iraq, having a baby, and then having that child die in his arms two years later.
The reality is that “shared humanity” is that center piece that James talks about and is at the center of all of this. Story means that there is some arc, some turning point, some different perspective gained through the living and the telling. I like ones that have a comeback element of redemption since the “against all odds” quality makes the new vision of life all the more poignant. But that doesn’t mean the other side of redemption is some kind of perfect vision of manhood or humanity. John Oliver and Perry and I are no better and no worse than Kamber or frankly anyone else. We have lived and struggled and seen some important aspect of ourselves. But the warts remain. The struggle remains.
The key is simply that I believe so very men are struggling just under the surface with the stuff of life. They have kids and wives and jobs and parents. None are easy. They don’t want to go on Dr. Phil to talk about their feelings but they are also sick of being portrayed a fools. In short, they have a story to tell.
Comment by Tom Matlack — July 1, 2009 @ 9:11 pm
how can I purchase the Book?
Comment by Kaylene Moon — November 9, 2009 @ 4:07 am
YesI would like to know how I can purchase the book and what is the price? Kaylene
Comment by Kaylene Moon — November 9, 2009 @ 11:18 pm